They say I am the Corn Goddess (my heart is yellow as an ear of corn) and that I am The Virgin (the Maiden who yields to all yet is penetrated by none). I am supposedly a great caregiver, the saddest moon sign, and very sensitive. I’ve noticed people enjoy your sensitivity when you are taking care of them and in your art, but not so much in other areas. I guess I am too critical but I swore my last mushroom trip that I would be more compassionate to myself - I can see where they are coming from though – I recently saw a Fairfeld Porter painting in person and went into a pretty dark self-hating spiral because I’ll never be able to make pinks that vibrate like his. And that I get along with bulls, but I’ve spent a lot of time with them (I even see them in the rocks in the ocean) but I don’t know if we are the most compatible. I’ve heard that I’ll fuss over you if I love you and watch your caffeine intake like a hawk (if I was your girlfriend, would you let me dress you, I mean help you pick your clothes out before we go out?) I was born when the year is starting to exhale, letting go of its heat and wildfire smoke to make room for the Libra (my worry stone). My astrological sign is my mother’s last name which translates to the “floor or ground” and the figures in my paintings are all on the ground. I also sleep on the ground. Maybe I am not ready for what’s there when I stand up because the ground world is enough for me right now. I tell the ferns all this and they think it’s silly and suggest I relax, because, after all, I am just one of them.
*quoted are Joanna Newsom, Starhawk, and Prince.